What Qualifies as Abuse or Neglect?
Question by penguinxcrossing: What qualifies as abuse or neglect?
My sister-in law has 2 Children (had three but gave one up for adoption) and is pregnant with a 4th at the ripe age of 24. She doesn’t have a job and “couch surfs” with her family (my in-laws). They turn a blind eye to her parenting because some of them fear that if they try to take the kids and lose they will never see them again. some of them turn a blind eye because they believe that family is family and even if someone is a black sheep, they are THEIR black sheep and its family business.
I firmly believe, however, people who stand by and watch bad people do bad things and don’t do anything are just as bad as the bad people.
The unfortunate thing is that we have no proof of neglect or abuse as far as I know. The most recent event, and the proverbial straw that broke the camels back, is we were at a picnic and they showed up, and her oldest daughter was being fussy (5 yrs old) and faking choking on a hot dog. The mom went over and told her to stop whining and then the daughter spit the hot dog out on to the moms hand. The mom then shoved it back in the daughters mouth causing her to actually choke for a second.
The only other evidence that I have is here-say, and things that constitute bad parenting in my book but not illegal parenting, or things that I know are happening but can’t prove(being homeless, having warrents out for arrest, no job, deadbeat dad, having drugs in house, daughter says she gets hit, not being taken to school, history of mental illness (bi-polar and possibly schizophrenia) etc…)
I live in Kansas City Missouri, does anyone have any advice on what we could do to help these kids? My wife has finally had the last of it and agreed that we need to do something. We both have good stable jobs, and have a kid of our own and we would want to try to get custody of the kids. But if we can’t do that we want to get them away from her.
Best answer:
Answer by Guess Who
If the kids are being neglected or abused, then you have the same right as anyone else to contact CPS. You can do that anonymously.
The kids live with you in-laws. Why would your in-laws allow abuse and neglect of their grand-kids right under their noses in their own home?
A criminal record, being unemployed, being jobless, having deadbeats for baby daddies, etc., do not diminish parental rights. Also, remember that deadbeat dads have parental rights, too. There has to be neglect and/or abuse so severe that it endangers the children’s lives.
What can you do to help these kids? Quit being selfish. Befriend the mother. Offer to help her take care of her children whenever she needs someone to help. Being alone with three children isn’t easy. Before you know it the children will be staying at your home more than they will with their mother. If and when that becomes the case, then it is time to act as to gaining custody.
Good luck
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